how's it gonna be

Roger didn't know what to do with himself. Granted, he knew what was going to happen. He guessed. But at the moment, there was nothing to do. Summer classes didn't start until next week. He so wished he'd taken off with Ellie for Lonnie's high school graduation, but he hadn't. He started working at Bakers, cashiering and well, he had to show dear old dad and the rest of the world he could handle it.... so he'd stayed behind, wishing he wasn't so alone now.

Naturally, he found himself in Ellie's room. They'd just moved in together. Roommates. It was a nice little house his Dad was trying to sell, but decided since Roger was starting college now that perhaps the best way to go was to make it a rental. It was a three bedroom, after all. And Roger got the master bedroom, but he'd decided to camp out in Ellie's room. She wasn't here, and he was lonely. He didn't want to think about it. He was still coping with his breakup with Cory, and well, nothing had been the same since, and that was going on a year, perhaps. It was suppose to be mutual. Even so, Roger always thought Cory got the better end of the deal. Roger didn't know who he was seeing now. After all, Cory was at Missouri State. So far away. Even the phone calls, stopped, after awhile. Roger was a Senior then, and he was suppose to be focusing on his grades. He and Ellie had made a vow together last year. Date no one. Get good grades.

Really, it was over with Cory. He had to remember that, and Cory said he'd done it for Roger's own good. It never quite felt that way. Even now.

So as he sat there in the middle of Ellie's queen sized bed, he thought perhaps this was the best it could be. Being Ellie's best friend. He didn't want that to change, but it would. Only in time. He hated that time was ticking. He didn't want things to change. He liked this. Never asking too much of each other, but always there. Just in case.

He snuggled one of her favorite crochet bunnies then, and he wished he wasn't quite so pathetic. How come she always came out the stronger one? How come?

Suddenly his cell buzzed in his pocket. Really, he felt this was the closest thing to sex that ever happened to him, lately.