Thursday, August 18, 2011

hows it gonna be

"So if they move out, do we get their room?" Leon asked while he and Tyra were hanging out with Ryan and Roger in the livingroom.

"I don't care." Roger shrugged as if the only person he saw in the room anyway was Ryan who sat next to him, who was being a bit sullen, chanel surfing.

"No, I like my room the way it is." Tyra spoke up then.

"I just thought, we..might need something bigger." Leon stressed the size with his hands.

"Look, Leon, you don't even officially live here." Roger glared at him.

"Watcha talking about." Leon winced with a laugh. He smiled at Tyra then. She gave him a playful shove back. "Look, we're all going to the LARP meet this weekend. So, you know, we could take your car."

Roger looked at Leon. Then over at Ryan.

"Naw, we're NOT going with you." Ryan shook his head, no. Roger just shrugged. Usually, they did what ever Ryan wanted. It was easier that way. No fussing. Like the time, Ryan wanted the fish net over the bed and Roger thought it would be so much sweeter to have the Christmas lights wrapped around the bed headboard.

"Like I said, we can go with you guys." Leon kept smiling.

Ryan festered a frown. Roger wondered if Ryan even liked Leon who always went on how they went way back.

Finally, Leon and Tyra went to the basement.

"So ... why can't they go with us?" He clicked off the TV then.

"I don't think they should come." Ryan looked at Roger then. "Hope will be there."

"What does she have to do with anything?" Roger winced then hugging himself. He didn't want to hear about Ryan's ex. As it was, Ryan wasn't all that keen on Roger's ex living in the house.

"I don't know." Ryan acted as if he might pull his hair out. "I don't want to deal with Leon and Tyra, right now. They're too happy." Ryan winced.

"What is so God awful about being happy?" Roger didn't know what to expect out of Ryan half the time. He knew how he needed the meds to change. Yet, fear got in the way. Half the time Ryan blamed Roger about why the course of treatment hadn't started yet. But Roger wondered if this little campout would end up in a breakup. Maybe Ryan wanted to get back with Hope.

Roger got up, wanting to scream some sense into Ryan. But then maybe he needed to talk some sense into himself about this charade of Ryan's. Yes, everything felt better in his head when he thought of Ryan being a guy. He liked that guy. He wanted that guy. But Ryan wasn't completely that guy. And what if all these changes transformed something entirely different than this person he was sitting next too?

He never wanted to stop watching Ryan. He didn't, but he wasn't sure he wanted to go through with this larping exercise, either.


Cafe Fashionista said...

So much speculation about everything - it's a confusing time. :/

ivy's closet said...

It could be just a new beginning..even if it is an ending.

lucy and sarah said...

Ryan seems to be in a bad place at the moment.

Mimi said...

"What is so God awful about being happy?" -- good question, and really the answer is it's not awful to be happy. everyone wants to be happy, right?

<3, Mimi