Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Audrey thought she might get sick on the banana bread. Like always, she indulged too much. One of her downfalls, she guessed. But it was ages since she'd cooked, and she liked it.
Of course, she'd had different ideas with Aidan. Perhaps, she was just on autopilot, sometimes. As if it were expected of her. It was only sleep with him. Maybe that's what she needed. Of course, she knew his little brother thought differently.
She and Henry had a little run in at the library. He informed her she was doing a lousy job. But she knew this was all about his brother, or the idea that he should have her job. She let him have his say and never let him know there wasn't anything going on with her and Aidan.
On the other hand, Aidan got on the phone with her mother. They had a very long talk.
"You can stay here, but you still have to see them from time to time." Aidan told her. "If this doesn't work out, you might end up jail, again." She didn't like the thought of that.
She always got a lot of reading done when she was in jail, but it was usually Harlequin romances or the classics.
"Now, you just have to find your passion." Aidan was so optimistic. She guessed he wasn't talking about what she could do for him in bed. A part of her wanted to tell him that he needed to get off all those pills and he'd be fine. Then they could be really good for each other. Aidan wouldn't go there.
He asked the impossible. What passion?
She couldn't sew on button. She definitely could never paint. Yes, she'd had a cause once upon a time. She wanted to save children in the system. Audrey almost got a job as a social worker. Except, she'd have to be drug tested, and that put her off.
"You're really bringing me down." She hugged herself. If she could just hang on to this measly library job, that was all she could ask for at the moment. And not to ask too much of him. He'd done more than enough, already. "I think we need to get that apartment fixed up." She tried to be happy about it, but it was best if she got out of his life as soon as possible. She promised to pay for the room.
The hardest part was really liking herself. She never really did. Audrey always wanted to be someone people liked. Now, she felt she'd never really been that person anyone ever liked.