Sunday, May 3, 2015

living on a prayer

Grayson & Nora

It was a surprise, Grayson didn't know if he should awake anyone or not, but he still had the house key. Of course, he was dragging after his long flight, but he was glad he could be home.

No one was awake so he crept upstairs to his room with his duffle bag. Just like he suspected, Nora was cuddling a pillow, as if he might be there. He smiled in the moonlight and got undressed as quietly as he could and crawled in, under the covers.

He could hardly stay awake himself. Next thing he knew the sun illuminated the room and the bed moved. He awoke with Nora looking down on him.

"You didn't tell me! Why didn't you tell me you were coming!" She smiled and kissed him ever so sweetly. But it wasn't long until she was laying next to him as if she'd go right back to dreamland.

"I'm too tired to even talk about it." He yawned.

"I know. Me too." She said taking care of Joel was a lot harder than she thought. She sounded if she was in limbo. "We are making the right choice about this, aren't we?"

"Of course, we are." Grayson told her. "When he gets better, he can come live with us."

"That is if he gets better." She sounded so sad. "What if he can never take care of himself?" She didn't sound hopeful.

"You said, there are a lot things he can do. He just doesn't want to talk."

"He doesn't want to walk. He has to wear an adult pamper, you know." She sounded as if that was the worst issue of all. She was the one who had had to change it.

Grayson hugged her close, knowing how she hated to see Joel this way. Maybe he'd gotten her hopes up, but he didn't think Joel would end up in a nursing home. He didn't want to believe that could happen.

Living on a prayer

It hadn't helped to see his mother. Joel decided this some time ago. He'd vowed he would not speak to her. Yet, it turned out, he couldn't speak to anyone. He thought he'd seen Grayson in a dream. Funny, Grayson made it sound as if Joel was being kept hostage somewhere, against his will. Then nothing happened.

Obviously, a dream. He was in a dream state a lot. A part of him felt far removed from this world. Yet, his eyes could see the world from, perhaps a bird's eye view. On occasion. He loved the feeling of flying. Yes, in the beginning he could see himself wasting away in that bed at the hospital. And then, it all changed and he was pushed into a deep sleep, full of memories, when he was younger. When his parents were together.

There was time to think where it all went wrong. Then suddenly,  the nightmare of the night it all happened would come zooming back to him. Who was he with? Of course, he thought of Vada. No, it wasn't her. Some girl. Her laughter. It was the sound of everything happily-ever after. For a moment he felt floating in mid-air. And then the collision. His heart pounding. Then not.

There was no way to escape it.

But Nora came. Finally. And he was happy to see her, but his head was just too thick to say anything.

But they said he was better. He was awake. He should know better. Why didn't he know better?

Just when he thought he might see Vada again. She was not there at this new place.

But there was a girl. And she was talking. So much talking. He wasn't quite sure what she wanted him to do.

"You, can do this Joel. I know you can."

Only Joel wasn't sure what she wanted him to do. Something about squeezing her hand.


cat eyes & skinny jeans said...

It's interesting to be in Joel's mind.


Launna said...

It's so interesting hearing what Joel was thinking about and his memories xox

ellie said...

Oh..some things you do have to ponder about.