I'm fighing this feeling

Quick fix and heartbeats, gets me so easily
Now you got me on my knees
This will be the death to me
Tic tac, time goes by, hits me so suddenly
How you knock me off my feet
I'm the Queen of Apologys

Now I'm fighting this feeling
but it never stops, never stops
I'm still waiting
And I'm stuck with this feeling
will it ever stop, ever stop?
I keep trying

I blame no one, but myself
so honestly, is this how it's gonna be?
Tell me, who's the enemy?
Monkey on my back keeps me so desperatly
How you got me on my knees
This will be the death to me

So sick of this feeling
but it never stops, never stops
I'm still waiting
And I'm stuck with this feeling
will it ever stop, ever stop?
You see, I'm still shaking
And I'm fighting this feeling

This will be the death to me
I'm the Queen of Apologys

And I'm fighting this feeling
but it never stops, never stops
I'm still waiting
And I'm stuck with this feeling
will it ever stop, ever stop?
I keep trying
And I'm fighting this feeling
And I'm stuck with this feeling
will it ever stop, ever stop?
I keep trying

This will be the death to me
This will be the death to me
I'm the Queen of Apologys
-the sounds



Ellie blinked back tears as she got into her car. She couldn't get his words out of her head. It sounded so true, but she didn't want to believe him. Although, she wanted to throw up too. Ellie didn't know what to do.

She was going to break up with him. She was. This time it would be for good. And it was. Just not like she expected.

Ellie thought they could be friends. Yeah, it could fall back to that. Maybe. OK, maybe friends with benfits. No. It wasn't like that. But still. This would be hard. Deep down, she kept thinking maybe they would never be friends. Ever. But maybe they could just have sex. Really. It could work.

In theory, it was possible. Of course, if they were highly intellectual and understood need over feelings or if they were monkeys, tigers or even dogs. But they were none of that.

Yes, this was all Eric fault. He'd decided for her, hadn't he?

She drove straight to Elliot's.

"What's the matter?" He was puzzled and in the middle of laundry. She thought it kind of funny, seeing him fold towels and digging his briefs out of a load of sheets.

"Nothing." She'd help. She was as domesticated as the next girl. Wasn't she?

"Did you fail a test or something?" He smelled of cookie dough, and his skin was just amazing to look at.

Before she knew it, she was kissing him as if she might have an illness of some sort, and he was the only drug to stop it.

"Now, hold on there, stranger," he took a breather from the lip lock, "Tell me, what did you do?"

"Nothing," She felt a little clingy. She didn't mean to be. "Sorry. Just happy to see you." She grinned with a shrug.

His smile was open then and he held on to Ellie's hand as if this was enough. But she begged to differ. Somehow. It didn't feel right. Not the same. Not when she was with Eric. Not when he would caress her, and they would lay together. It was like magic.

"I should do your nails," he looked at her fingers.

She was going to say, no. "All right." She just stared at him.

They sat down at his little kitchen table then as he studied her nails. Ellie took in a breath. She couldn't make her self smile. She could hardly bare it. Eric hated her. What if Elliot would too?