Sunday, January 22, 2012
sad holidays and bitter vacations
"How could you?" Milo barely got out the words. Sometimes, it was hard to know if Lola's brother was in a bad mood or not. All his days seem to be the same now that he was in a wheel chair, paralyzed from the waist down.
"You know, he's around." Lola knew what Ian must be thinking. She had a kid, which she sort of did, but Liam was Milo's son, who was only two. And she was his caregiver for the most part. Especially, since her mother was sick, off and on. She was battling her Parkinson Disease. "I can't just NOT talk about you."
Lola hadn't meant to raise her voice, but sometimes, it was great to get away. Especially, with Ian, but she was needed at home. She couldn't possibly keep this up. She was thinking of quitting school. She'd get a job. Although, this was more of a fantasy than anything. It was the thought... what could she really do?
"You'll regret it." Milo's face was so hallow. He was not who he used to be. He was not like this before Liam was born. It was such a sudden thing. A car wreck left him paralyzed. He still didn't talk about it. Of course, it was a sore subject, even now. He and Emma, Liam's mother broke up minutes before they were in the crash.
Lola knew he was depressed. Sometimes, she wondered if Milo found joy, keeping her depressed too.
"Maybe, I will." She wanted to stop the lies with Ian. After all, he was her only friend. She wanted to believe she could get by on art. It was her love. She supposed she loved her family, too. But it was getting harder to accept the fact, they were keeping her locked away, from everything out there. As much as she loved her brother, it was not enough.