Thursday, March 27, 2014

the ups and downs

The Ups & Downs

Carson hardly slept after the disaster at his Aunt's dinner with his brother Gage.

He felt as if he'd been in the middle of a horror film. He didn't know why it bothered him. He thought he'd seen it all with his mom on drugs when he was a kid. Yes, he'd spent some years away from her in the foster care system. As soon as she got better, he always had to go back to her. Even when he didn't want too.

He didn't mention any of this to Gage. Of course, Gage found it to be a total laugh about Henry's seizure while on the way home.

"Oh, grow up." Carson snapped. "I bet you've seen things like that before." He was serious. For all he knew maybe either one of them could be epileptic too. He remembered a girl who had it and so did her sister. "You, want me laughing at you..if something like that happens to you?"

"I was just joking." Gage looked at Carson as if he were the one with a problem, not him. "Lighten up."

Carson still felt a little out of it, even now. He'd called his Aunt the next day to see how Henry was doing. Of course, his Aunt was worried about Carson. About how things were going between him and his brother.

"All right." He couldn't exactly tell her how he really felt. Actually, it was a bit of a lost cause. If he was wealthy, it might have been a different story, but he had a pretty good feeling Gage would use him in the end. Maybe even now. He didn't really know him. Probably never would.

Afterwards, he felt guilty that he hadn't called his mom since Christmas. He just didn't want to be sucked back into her world. At the moment, it felt so bad to avoid her, but it was relief not having to be there for all her problems.

But he hated being all alone too. He didn't know what to do, and it surprised him when Essie showed up at the Campus Coffee shop.

He wasn't going to smile, but he did. He couldn't help it.

"What are you doing here?" It would be time to close up shop soon. He offered a free drink of her choice. She said she liked coffee. Black.

"You, said to come by." She reminded him.

"Oh, yeah..yeah.." He guessed he did, "But..I didn't think, you would."

"Well, you seemed really interested in that shelving unit." She pressed a smile. "I just wanted to see how dedicated you'd be to a project like that."

"Did you?" Carson kept smiling. Honestly, he did want  to learn something new and useful. Of course, it didn't hurt he was learning such skills from someone who looked as if she wouldn't even know how to hold a hammer.