Thursday, March 29, 2018
one day at a time
Josie could tell her mother was alarmed by her pregnant size.
"But, but you're so little." Her mom told her she would always be her baby girl. "I have to worry. I'm sorry."
Her mother was full of questions. What was she craving? Did she feel OK? Had she been going to her checkups? Is your heart OK?
Josie said yes to all of the questions. "You know, I gain weight when I'm pregnant." She was doing her best to stay away from carbs, but she especially loved pineapple and mangos now.
Still, there was something she was keeping from her mother. Cervical Cancer. It was something she could hold her breath and make go away. It was something they would have to wait out after the baby was born.
It was something Henry had learned with her. He was really being calm about it. Perhaps, it was because his Young Adult Librarian job kept him busy. Or he knew it was best not to worry her. He was keeping upbeat and positive.
Yes, she hated keeping secrets from her mother, but she didn't want to worry her until she absolutely had too.
Josie had never prayed so hard about this new obstacle in her life. It was a personal and yet spiritual journey. Trying her best to feel happy with each moment she had with her daughter and husband, each day.
She also wanted to give back. Although, it wasn't as easy trying to find ways to help others when she was a young pregnant mother wanting to be home with her family.
Still, it made her feel better to pack a backpack of goodies for the homeless or to give at the local pantry. She didn't have time to crochet hats and blankets like she used, too.
Hopefully, she would get through this and visit her mother more often. It wasn't until that she realized her mother was really a good mother, even if there was a time in her life Josie was certain her mom had abandoned her when her parents divorced.
"You know, I love you." Josie smiled and gave her mom a hug in the warm and cozy kitchen Josie remembered back in high school. "And you're a wonderful Grandmother, too."