a lot like it used to be

There was a certain fire of lust or love, maybe in between, that Gage could hardly keep to himself when he saw Vada on stage.

She was so much stronger than him. She always would be. But he couldn't help but watch. Didn't she know, that's what got to him the most. The little things in her smile, a gaze, a turn of her head. Yes, he supposed this was enough.

Other wise, he could see he was in the way. She had friends now. All of them were giving her a hug, a cheer. She was wonderful in the play. That was just the first night.

Of course, he went to all the shows. So did the others. Dean and his girlfriend went to one more, but they were busy.

That guy, she now lived with, was there every night. Gage knew there was nothing he could do about it.

There were a lot of things he couldn't do nor touch. It was her wish. If she wanted to see him, she'd have to come to him. Even if he hated the idea. But he was certain that if nothing was left uncovered, it was probably best for the both of them.

Funny, he'd never gotten it into his head sooner. But he'd been away for a while in juvie. He even ended up in confinement for a while. A lot of time to think. Think of ways to change. He wanted to say he had, but what if he were wrong? What if he couldn't?

No, it was time to hunker down. Just play the quiet game. Get through this, the best he could. But some days were better than others. And then Josie showed up.

He was at the house. He guessed she was looking for Dean, but he wasn't here. And she didn't seem to want to know about the little children about.

"So..you and Dean.." He started. Gage looked at her as if he was happy for both of them. Before he could stop himself, he found himself telling her stories about Dean. How she needed to be scared. Did she know how Dean was abandoned as a baby? He was a meth baby.

"Shit like that can really mess you up." He hoped she didn't notice his sly grin. Of course, he was actually talking about himself. He was the one who burned down the old house, but she didn't really need to know.