Changing your ways 'cause you don't know what to do

 "I just wish I could understand you," Cade didn't mean to fret but he knew his brother Rafe wasn't happy with Kimmy. "Why are you even going out with her? Are you even  happy being in the band?"

Rafe blew a breath as he sat hunched up in his bed, hugging his knees with his stinky socks still on. Cade still shared a room with him. It had always been that way. Once bunk beds were now twins, each had their own side of the room.

"You know, if she got a whiff of those socks, that would be the end of it," Cade shrugged back. He doubted if Rafe even knew where the laundry basket was. He had not done laundry all summer. 

Rafe only made a face of disgust, before Cade knew it, he could see his brother was in tears. Of course, their dad had told them from the time they could think, "Boys don't cry." But that hadn't stopped Rafe when he was alone with Cade.

"What did you do this time?" Cade tilted his head and went to plop himself next to his brother. He gave him a pat on the back.

He remembered a time when he thought he and his brother would just get jobs and their own place together. They would always be together. But he knew that was just a childhood dream now. It was coming to an end. Cade was with Mercer and they planned to go to the University together at Lincoln. They would be roommates.

"Nothing," Rafe's voice cracked. Oh, he was never as tough as he acted. He was one who always wanted a deal. Possibly, like a free ride. 

"You should really talk to the counselor," Cade told him. They'd seen one during the pandemic via Facetime. Of course, he didn't know that did much good. He thought of how his parents always heard good things about Rafe and school, but Cade always knew he was depressed.

Rafe shook his head no. As if that would defeat the purpose. 

"I know, you want everything in the fast lane, but that's not the way it works. You got to stop and enjoy the little things. Maybe..maybe you are enjoying the little things with Kimmy."

"But I'm not," he cleared his throat. "I..I miss..you know who." He blurted and then gave Cade a look as to not say LILY'S name. He sighed heavily. "I know I..I have to get passed that. I mean, I want to hate Boone so much, but I really can't. I think he's right for her, you know..and.."

"See, you are growing up," Cade almost cracked a smile.

"It's just being tied down to Kimmy...I can't." Rafe shook his head, no. 

"You have to break up." Cade shot him a look. "Don't do anything crazy. Don't be mean. Don't do that to somebody who was only a distraction."

"I keep thinking, she'll break up with me, you know." Rafe shrugged back in thought. It didn't look like either one of them would get to sleep tonight.

"I know you don't like bad endings. You could never watch the ending of OLD YELLER." Cade pressed his lips tight.

"Yeah, and mom thought you were going to be a heart surgeon. You always loved all that blood and gore." Rafe looked over at him as if he was the one who was tougher than he would ever be. After all, it was Cade who always saved him from being bullied without even using his fists or his feet. He would casually say something about how the bullies might end up in prison if they didn't quit this kind of behavior and he would keep questioning them until they ran away.

"Well, I'm not going to be you, to break up with her," Cade told him. "You just have to talk. Tell her it's time for you to both move on. Remember Love isn't LOVE until you let it go."