a cry in the woods

Ryan couldn't stop thinking what Hope's last words were, "You're the most selfish person I know! Its always about you! It always will be."

She didn't want to think it true, but maybe it was. She couldn't help that this obstacle of her's had taken over her life. No one seemed to know this trap she was in, just being in her body. There was no way out of it. It wasn't like she could cut herself out of this skin and be who she should be. Even if it it could happen, that was complicated too.

Now, it didn't seem to matter. All Ryan could think on was getting Roger back to shore. Obviously, he was an idiot for going in, anyway. A part of her wanted to scream this information into him now, but she knew that wouldn't have done much good.

Funny, how she thought of the two of them as cliche as the blind leading the blind. Neither, knew exactly what they were doing together. But amazingly, it felt true and infused with a life of it own, until about five minutes ago.

She hated that she'd spoke with Hope in the first place. Why had she taken off after Hope, to begin with? No way, did she want to make up. But more or less try to make Hope understand why they were no good together.

Yet at the moment, the real notion arrived. Roger really did need her.

"Don't you die on me now!" She beat at his chest. He gurgled some. She cleaned out what water she could out of his mouth and started to recess, then back to his chest. Again, and again. Until, Leon came over and told her... he was going to be all right.

She felt herself shaking as she scooted her knees under herself and watched all around. Waiting for Roger to keep breathing. He looked a bit like a fish floundering, wet and grimy.

Ryan was overwhelmed with tears then. Maybe Hope was right. She hadn't thought of anybody but herself. She wanted to stop thinking that way. She really did.