Friday, May 25, 2012
bitterness loves company
Henry stuffed another dirty sock in Derrick's dresser while Derrick was contemplating something on his electric guitar. As it was Derrick hadn't lifted one finger to clean his room. It was all Henry's doing. Just a little more vacuuming might help. Henry was ready to vacuum, if Derrick would ever move his feet.
"Why are you doing this now?" Derrick winced hard.
Henry was suddenly getting a clear picture of Derrick. It was as if Derrick wasn't going to do anything to help with the adoption situation.
"I told you," Derrick shot him a look. "Battle of the bands. You and me." He made it sound as if he was going into a one on one fight with Topher. Instead of Topher's band.
"But, its too late. We aren't ready." They should have been practicing months ago. It was so last minute, but Derrick knew a guy and got them in because someone's band broke up, last minute. It was just insane to think they should perform, anywhere.
"We would be, if..if you'd stop cleaning my goddamn room!" Derrick snapped.
Henry winced. He didn't like Derrick's tone.
"You, stop playing that awful Green Day song!" Henry shouted. "Stop being so..so selfish. Do you want something to happen ..where..where you might end up in Foster care, yourself."
That quietened Derrick. He put the electric down. Henry sighed.
"What are you trying to do? You know you count on Asa for everything. Here he is, trying to help even more, and this is the thanks he gets. How can you do this to him? Honestly?" Henry wasn't smiling. He wasn't his happy self. He did want to be here for Derrick, but he didn't like Derrick's attitude.
Of course, Derrick only fumed. He wouldn't talk about it. Henry kept his eye on him. Perhaps Derrick was the most stubborn person he'd ever met, but he was in love with him. He didn't want change anymore than Derrick did. But things were evolving. And it was hard for Henry to guess sometimes, just what Derrick was mad about.
Henry bit his bottom lip, thinking this might be the moment Derrick would be furious with him. He hated this feeling.
"OK." Derrick swelled a frown. "Fine. My room is clean." He shrugged as if he'd cooled down and would put this rockstar thing on hold as he put his guitar away.
"Yeah, because of me." Henry looked at him blankly.
"OK. I'm sorry. Really." Derrick sat on the bed, and patted down a spot. Henry hesitated to sit next to him because as badly as he wanted to kiss Derrick..he knew that was another of Derrick's procrastinating tactics. "Its just, I-I feel as if I have no real say in what happens next..with Josie and the baby." Derrick licked his dry lip. "And..and Topher. You'd think he was so bad ass, but I tell you, I can beat him. We can so do this. You and me." He looked Henry in the eye.
Henry nodded. Maybe they could. But what if they didn't? Derrick took Henry's hand.
"I want to be like you. I do. I want everything to be sunny and happy. You are not like anyone else. I don't want to ruin that for you. I don't." Derrick sighed. "I promise I'll ...I'll be here for Asa. I'll do whatever it takes, but you have to help me with this battle of the bands."
Henry felt Derrick's pulse. He kissed the side of Henry's forehead. Soon Henry forgot what they were even cross about. Wasn't this what he came for, anyway?