Friday, August 16, 2013
now that you know
Dorian knew Ruben was right. He needed to get this over with..with Jason. A part of him wanted to surprise Jason. Perhaps make dinner and invite Heather and Jason over. See how that turned out.
He didn't want it to end badly. Best just to admit who he was bringing to the wedding.
"You mean, you aren't bringing Lena?" Jason looked at Dorian as if he was just teasing him. They were at the park with Jason's collie Roy. He tossed the blue Frisbee and Roy made a run for it, catching it in mid air. The animal was a thing of beauty to watch as he jumped higher and higher.
"Well, she's seeing someone now." Dorian nodded.
"Dude, that sucks." Jason told him as he gave another go with the Frisbee for the dog to catch.
"She seems really happy. And I'm happy for her. Besides, I have Ruben." Dorian felt like shoving his hands deep in his old kakis, but he tried to stay easy going and relaxed.
"Ruben?" Jason's laugh was a little snide. "Who in the hell is that?"
"He's my date for the wedding." Dorian shrugged.
"You, can't bring a guy to my wedding." Jason shook his head as if that would be disgusting.
"Fine." Dorian looked Jason in the eye. "Then I won't be there, either."
"What? You're my best man." Jason squinted hard as if this was all just nonsense.
"But, Ruben is my boyfriend." Dorian knew it was his own damn fault. He should have said this earlier. Except, he really hadn't planned on Ruben being in his future. Sometimes, he guessed he needed to wear a name tag 'I'm gay'. Still, did it have to be everyone's business?
"When did you, decide to get weird on me?" Jason was pissed now. The dog barked as if he were ready for another catch. Finally Jason tossed the Frisbee.
"I dunno. I wasn't planning on this happening." Dorian knew it was his fault. "I wasn't. And then it did."
"Back up. What are you trying to tell me? When did you.." He didn't seem to know what to ask.
"I've always known-"
"You knew? You ..why didn't you tell me?" He looked at Dorian hard as if Dorian might be contagious with some freaky disease he didn't want to have anything to do with. Suddenly, Dorian felt as if he were in a sweat. It was more than humidity that was getting to him.
"I'm sorry. I..I just didn't think it would come up. I didn't ..want.. you thinking...that..you had something to worry about, because you didn't. I like you.." He felt his heart speeding up. He could hardly hear himself think. "I like being your friend. I just want to see you..happy." He sighed, thinking now he should have kept his mouth shut. He'd been selfish to say anything.
Jason shook his head. He wouldn't look at Dorian who nursed his bottom lip.
He guessed this was something he couldn't fix, but he hated to leave the wedding in a mess. After all, Jason's big day was next week.