let's go to the east coast

Simon really did forget how sad he was...until now.

Maybe it was a wakeup call. Although, all he did was sleep and tried to remember his previous lover, which he still couldn't even imagine her name. Just Candy was on his mind and she was no longer here.

Maybe..it was because...

He said she was fat. Not exactly, but he knew it was implied. Seriously, she'd put on some weight during the last few weeks. She was short anyway and she kept making cookies, cakes, and even bread. It was only a matter of time.

Not that he'd loved her any less. She was a pillow of pleasure and he could have hybernated under her skin for a very long time. But that isn't real. Although, there was that time. It made him smile all over. It was never going to be like that again.

She was a little harsh. She wanted him to do things. Like move furniture. Watch those stupid Chinese dramas with her. Ugh.

Yes, they ran out of things to do during lockdown. Sex was not enough. Evidently. Unfortunately, he must have been an addict of some kind. According to her.

"What else are we supposed to do?" He'd asked and she'd responded they should think of their future and he'd shouted back, "What if there is no future?" He wanted to get in as much fun as he could before the virus got him.

"I mean us?" She'd looked so sad, but he still didn't get it. Did she really want a raise a family in this god awful world?

Yes, it felt deep at the time, but he wished they hadn't shouted about it. And now it was over and all he had was Steve.

They were just friends online. Mostly. Yes, they'd had a class or two together, but it was nothing. He was nobody. And yet, Steve was the only one to reach out to every text Simon sent out. Not even his Mom cared.

When Steve showed up, it was a surprise. Naturally, Steve looked at the apartment a bit alarmed.

"Do you even know how to clean up, Bro?" Steve slapped on the rubber gloves and went to work.

Simon only watched thinking now this was what Candy wanted. Steve was such a better match for her than he was. It hurt to think that the little things like this were the nuts and bolts of a relationship. Finally, Simon helped dry dishes. He washed the sheets, thinking if he called Candy right now, she might come back if she knew he was cleaning up.

And yet, he knew it went much deeper. Unfortunately.

"What if I just did myself in, right now?" Simon came to the conclusion right after Steve was finishing up vacuuming the livingroom.

"What?" Steve looked at him as if he'd really lost it. He grabbed his shoulders as if he could shake some sense into him, but before he could Simon kissed him. Simon didn't want to be alone.