When you finally hear what's really weighing you down

 "I was the only one who didn't have a date," Boone kept looking at his coffee. He said he'd never seen his adopted mom so happy around his real dad. It was quiet at the moment in the bakery.

Lily watched him smile. She couldn't help but smile too. Of course, she was only nursing an iced lemonade through a straw.

"So did you have a good Mother's day?" He wanted to know when his tired eyes looked up at her. He was leaning at the dough table. Naturally, he was covered in flour.

Lily found herself laughing, "You make it sound like I'm a mom or something." He always said the funniest things. She talked about Gram and her stepmom. "I called my mom." She was straight-lipped then.

"I kind of wonder if I'll ever meet my real mom," he shrugged. "I mean, in the beginning, we talked on the phone. It was like talking to a secretary or something, you know, like 'let me see what I can find out for you.' It wasn't what I was expecting. But then again, I didn't know what I was expecting. I did try to call her on Mother's Day, but just left a voicemail. I dunno. It's like she's afraid I'll hate her or something. All I want is to see her. Face to face, you know. I know I was a mistake. I understand that. I mean, I got over it. Why can't she get over it?"

Instantly, Lily's eyes filled with tears. Somehow, she felt she'd been there. And she knew she should have been on her mother's side back then, but she wasn't.

"It must be hard for you real mom," Lily found herself saying. Although, she was thinking of her own. "My mom went to prison for my dad. I don't think she wanted to and he..well, he's changed for the better. But you know, he's a policeman's son and well, his family really hated her..thinking she'd gotten him into drugs...and well, I was too young to know what was going on. But sometimes, I remember how hard it had been for her. We spent a lot of times at the park. When I think back about it, we might have been homeless back then. But I've been with Gram most of my life. I always felt safe at Gram and Gramps."

She looked at him then, as if she'd said too much. She'd never told anyone this. Ever. A part of her forgot it was even true.

"Why isn't your dad in jail now?" Boone's eyes were so dark and serious. All she could do was give him a shrug. She didn't really know. 

"We're not as close as we used to be. Sometimes, I think it was just this little window of time. You know, I was about eight or so, and then he remarried and I dunno, we seemed to have lost touch since I've been a teen." She sighed. "I guess it's that way for fathers and daughters. Maybe. I mean he's busy with the little ones." She pressed her mouth on the straw and hoped for more sweet lemonade, but it was the end of the drink and it was sour.

"Well, he is close by. You could visit anytime," Boone nodded.

Lily nodded. It was a good idea, but doing it felt like such a chore.