Before there is a next time

 "I don't know what's going to happen," Bom cornered Jay as soon as he brought Hope over. "Ivy's been here all week."

"Did something happen?" He asked back quietly.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," Bom almost winked with a stressful smile. 

He put down Hope and looked around to see if Ivy was in the livingroom.

"Where is she?"

"In..in Keanu's room. She's been staying there." Bom edged toward the kitchen and Jay followed.

"Well, tell me what's going on?" He was certain she'd say it was all his fault in the next breath.

"She and her mom had kind of ...I dunno," Bom sighed. "Look, it's good news for us, because she doesn't want her mother's house, but Dan's pretty upset about it."

Jay nodded.

"But..but they're still together, right?"

"I hope," Bom sighed. "I doubt she'd want to talk to you."

"But..but I should talk to her," he decided. They couldn't walk around as if they were on eggshells around her. He took Hope's hand then and went to Keanu's room. Of course, Keenu was happy to see them both but Ivy was focused on the puzzle on the floor. She didn't even look up, but Hope came over and kicked it and the puzzle went everywhere.

Ivy looked up at her as if she was the worst.

"Guess, who's here," Jay smiled, but Ivy said nothing. She seemed so out of it. Of course, Hope came over and gave her a wet kiss. She might as well have slobbered all over her. She plopped right in Ivy's lap.

"See, she remembers you," Jay went on to say. Still, Ivy looked as if she'd just survived a war zone and didn't know what to do. It was sad, but he didn't want to push her into anything either.

"We just thought we might stop by and you know, see you for a bit. We won't stay long."

She finally nodded. Jay wasn't sure if Ivy should be here.

"I don't know, she seems so different," Jay said to Lindy when he got home. Yes, he had Hope with him. He thought it best just to keep her home on the schedule she was used to.

"How different?" Lindy wanted to know.

"Oh, she never said much of anything," this worried Jay the most. Of course, he didn't have any answers either. Lindy took Hope and got her settled at the table with her finger foods and sippy cup. Jay looked through his contacts on his phone and finally found Dan's number. He'd never had to call him before, but he guessed there was a first time for everything.

Be mindful even if your mind is full

 "First of all, you have to have your sleep pants on at all times, and a t-shirt," Alfie thought it was plausible until they figured out a better situation. Maybe they could find a deal on bunk beds. "Or make our own," Gage acknowledge that he was handy with a hammer and nails and there were plenty of tutorials on YouTube about those handy wooden pallets.

Alfie hated to burst his bubble. Oh, he'd seen plenty of ideas over the years about these pallets, but he didn't know much about building anything. 

"Let's just sleep on it, OK?" He yawned then as if time was wasting he could be making z's about now if Gage would stop talking. But he had a feeling the dude just did not want to sleep with him.

"Why are you so tired?" Gage asked. "It was only a little after nine in the evening.

"God, I've been going everywhere with Oakly lately," Alfie shrugged. "I think she wants to move here."

"Are you dating your little brother's adopted sister?" Gage looked at him as if that was a big no-no.

"Dating her?" Alfie laughed about the matter. "No." He was stammering around as if yes maybe he was making too much of it, but so was Gage. "I am not dating her. I am..I am only being her friend," Alfie snapped.

"Are you sure?" Gage squinted back as if he didn't think so. He put the fresh pillowcase on the pillow he brought. Alfie had put fresh bedding on the bed as if to make it all nice and cozy with a lavender scent.

"Yes, most definitely. We..we are not going out," Alfie thought he might get into a shouting match with Gage. He kept staring at Gage's pillow, it was flat and looked rather thin.

"That's kind of a sad pillow you got there," Alfie changed the subject.

"But I like it like this," Gage first said but then admitted. "I have a heavy head, all my pillows turn out this way sooner or later."

"Huh," Alfie didn't know what else to say. He'd never seen anything like it. It was like Gage sucked the life out of that pillow.

Alfie got on his side of the bed.

"We will just try it tonight, and if it doesn't work, we are getting more than one bed then," Alfie told him. 

"It'll help that I have my own comforter," Gage had brought his from home. 

"So, we're sleeping the Scandinavian way, is that it?" Alfie asked.

"Well, I am part Norwegian and you're Swedish," Gage said. Alfie clarified Dark Swedish.

"I thought there was only Dark Irish?" Gage squinted as if Alfie was making up this stuff. 

"My grandmother, told me so," Alfie informed him.

And a mess is not allowed

 "What could have happened so bad?" Bom still couldn't quite get it all straight. She was a little shell-shocked when Ivy's mother offered them the house, yet her mother was a bit livid about the matter. Naturally, Brian didn't rush to say anything. Of course, this was like winning the lottery. Having their own home, and in such a decent neighborhood. It couldn't be that bad.

"It's personal," Brian finally said as if it might have been his fault. He'd lived there with Ivy, back when they first got together. Of course, they were hush-hush about the matter at the moment. After all, Dan escorted Ivy here and asked if they could keep an eye on her. He thought Ivy was overdue a visit with Keanu. He wanted her to stay a night or two with them.

Of course, the conversation had only happened twenty minutes ago, but she rushed upstairs to see what this was about. Maybe Ivy wouldn't notice. After all, Keanu took her by the hand to show her all his Christmas in his room.

"What's going on?" Bom hoped Dan would enlighten her, but he was with the baby and he was crying as if something had finally awoken him.

Bom took the infant from him. It only calmed him a little. She could see Dan was restless. 

"I don't want to talk about it," Dan shook his head.

"Well, you are. I want to know if you and Ivy are..." She went and put the baby on his back in his crib. She kept smiling at him as if she were familiar with his likes and dislikes. Finally, he settled as she gently rubbed his tummy. His feet kicked in his terry cloth sleeper.

"She's..she's so stubborn." Dan finally admitted as he scratched the back of his neck.

"So are you." Bom told him they were too much alike. 

"I don't know why she turned her mother down. I..I think she blames her mother for her dad leaving, but I don't think that's true. I mean, she really is the glue that kept them a family. Maybe, maybe there was just too much pressure when Ivy was growing up. They expected her to be so much more. But it was her brother who always made the grades. He even went to public school while she went to private school." He pulled his long fingers into his dark hair, brushing his bangs away from his face. Finally, he confessed he was furious with Ivy, but he didn't know what to do. 

"I don't want her to be alone, but I think that's what she wants," Dan said he didn't know if he could fix this.

Hello my old heart

 

Ivy told her no. No way was she going to live in the house she grew up in. "That place had bad memories for me," Ivy was straight-lipped and as grim as she ever was. 

"But, it won't cost you hardly a thing," her mother was giving her a deal, but she didn't seem to notice.

Ivy shook her head, no.

"Fine, I'll let Bom and her bunch have it," her mother looked just as grim back at Ivy. Her fist were on her hips. "At least Keanu will have it, if you won't."

Ivy couldn't say a thing. She wanted to stand up to her, but she knew her mother could care less about her feelings. Her mom was with her boyfriend now at a new penthouse not far from his company where she worked. Bom worked there too.

"Where's Hope?" Her mother asked. "Why isn't she here?" It wasn't the weekend. 

Ivy looked up at her mother then as if she might have given up a right to know. "Well, she's with Jay." It wasn't that big of a deal, was it?

Her mother shook her head, and she got her bag. It was as if she wanted to yell at her but she knew it was useless. Just then her mother looked up and saw Dan coming from the kitchen with the newborn and a bottle.

"Do you really know her at all?" Her mother asked him.

Dan stood as if he might be the weakest buck in the corn patch. She told him then what she'd offered and how Ivy had turned him down. Dan only pressed his lips tight and looked at Ivy as if maybe she really was mad after all. But he was calm and said nothing.

After she left he told Ivy she needed to pack an overnight bag. "I think it's time you stayed with Keanu. I know he's got bunk beds. You could probably even sleep on the bottom."

"Are you saying, you're going to leave me?" She couldn't help to be in total shock.

"Not yet," he said. "It depends on you. I don't really know what's going on with you. But maybe you need a break from us."

He held on to the baby who was asleep in his arms, of course, he even took the bottle in his sleep.

Ivy knew she didn't have the energy to argue. Yes, it would depend on her and honestly, she'd never depended on herself except one summer. The summer that Jay went away.

How's it gonna be

 "So what are you going to do?" Joon wanted to know after giving Poppy some time to think about it. He was certain she would go to her father and lash it all out, but she didn't.

"What can I do?" He knew in her eyes she was heartbroken. Yet she was concerned about her mother's health. She really thought she was overdue a checkup.

"We'll start there," It didn't matter how she really felt. "I knew I would have to take care of her one day." But at that time she'd always thought of her as the Aunt who took her in, not some secret from the rest of the family.

"I need to talk to them too," she said she thought her grandparents had past but there was still a great uncle or maybe an uncle still in Shanghai.

"Are you going to see them?" Joon wondered if she would got there.

"No." Poppy said she'd be lost without him, but right now she just needed to make sure the woman who she'd always thought of as her aunt was taken care of. "Maybe she could be in assisted living near us."

"It's OK to be angry you know," Joon thought she was just keeping this all bottled up.

"What good will that do?" She said she'd had plenty of nights of crying over all this, but there were priorities too. 

He knew she was right. Joon was glad she was the grownup in all of this. As it was she was packing up.

"It's time to give this place up," she told him. After all, she was living with him now. 

"What are you going to do with all this?" Joon knew they had no place for all her furniture.

"I'll put some of it in storage. I'll try to sell the furniture." But she didn't think she'd get much for it. After all, it was the past. A lot of it reminded her of Alfie.

"Let's just see if we can find someplace that will take it away. Somebody I'm sure is in need of it," He got out his phone. She gave him a nod.

How about now?

 "You can't be serious," Alfie looked a bit wild-eyed at Christine as she was going through the applications for the clerk position in her little cube of an office. He'd spotted a name he was very familiar with. 

"Not her, please." He could beg, but he knew he had no authority here after he said it.

"What? We don't have that many applications," she looked at him puzzled. 

He sighed and pointed to the name.

"She's..she's just trouble," He practically spat.

"I know, she's been in some trouble as of late, but..but she needs a second chance too. She's going to counseling. She's doing some volunteering at the food pantry. She's trying. She really is. Besides, she blew all her saving paying her bond and she's now living in a trailer park." Christine gave him practically a sideways look. 

Alfie pressed his lips and fumed about the matter. He didn't want to see Remi. That was the last thing he needed this new year. It made him nervous. 

It didn't help he'd had such a dry spell since Poppy. What if? Oh, he cringed to think. He knew there was nothing he could do about this. It was best to leave it alone. After all, Christine had already hired Remi for the position. She had people skills and was pretty good with money too. 

He got out of her office fast enough when he got the call from Oakley.

"What's up?" He went outside of the building in to the cold wind. If only he'd remembered to bring his sweater or a parka would have really been nice about now, but he edged against the brick wall.

"Nothing much," she said she was in town and wondered if he would try this Mexican food place. She was studying at the library and had picked up some books from a professor who had moved here. "Do you want to have lunch?"

"Oh, that would be great." He smiled. Just what he needed. Oakley would have no idea about how she'd rescued him. Of course, it was best to just keep it simple. Going out for a meal was a good start. He wasn't asking for anything like a full-blown relationship. "I can meet you at the library."

"But I need some things at the drugstore," she told him. "I'll pick you up."

"Sure." He could definitely get used to this. 

And it's so hard to change

 

"Go ahead," Nora said she had a guestroom. Alec could stay there. "You can sleep with Alfie." Oh, and she expected at least three hundred dollars a month from him.

"What?" Gage cringed at the thought of sleeping with Alfie. "Why three hundred dollars? Especially, if I sleep with Alfie?" He crossed his arms. Gage was in a huff.

"Have you paid your utility bills lately? Heat alone has been awful," she reminded him that winter was cold. Someone was going to have to help her pay the bill.

"Couldn't I..I just sleep with Alec?" Gage said.

"I don't think so." She was adamant. "A boy needs his space. A growing boy. He needs a place to study, but of course, you could always read to him, and then you could let him read to you." She thought that was the solution.

Gage sighed even more as if the whole thing was ridiculous. 

"Let's just think of it being temporary. You could find your own place," she said. "Sooner or later."

Naturally, Gage drew a frown. 

"Maybe you and Alfie could find a place together," she smiled ever so brightly as she went on to start dinner. 

Of course, she had Alec helping her, discussing what they should have to eat. Gage only watched as the two were really bonding. Something he hadn't seen in a long time. Alec didn't even help at home. He was always watching TV, but it wasn't on. 

"Fine." Still, he didn't like the idea of sleeping with Alfie.

Feel it in my soul

 

"I think we found a house," Jory dreaded telling Dan about it, because he knew he wasn't fond of the idea. After all, they weren't going anywhere. "It's pretty close to my sister's and well, you know. I always wanted that to happen someday. You know, to be close enough." He shrugged about the matter. They had a little time to get out on the basketball court. It was a holiday after all.

Jory mentioned he'd had the help of someone who was flipping houses in an older neighborhood. "There was a lot to consider, but this guy isn't one of those who bandage it up and tries to sell it quick. Still, it's a good deal and I think we can manage it."

Dan didn't have much to say. He took the ball and dribbled a bit then took a shot mid-court.

"Nice." Jory wasn't so sure how Dan was feeling these days. After all, being a new dad with a newborn meant plenty of sleepless nights. Jory asked about that.

"Here's the thing, Angel can sleep through just about anything," Dan said as if that wasn't normal.

"Just give him time," Jory shrugged back. "You guys don't have Hope around, do you?"

"Not yet." Dan was even-lipped about it.

"She'll keep him awake," Jory smiled.

"I'm not sure when..well, Ivy doesn't want to talk about it."

"What?" Jory winced hard. "You guys aren't sharing custody with Jay anymore?"

"I dunno. They let it slide, I guess. You know with Angel being born and all those complications before." Dan said Ivy hadn't seen Hope since Thanksgiving.

"What?" Jory practically yelped. He only sighed. 

"Ivy's mad at Jay and so she's not talking to him at all," Dan told him.

"But why?" Jory caught the ball from Dan and took a shot. It bounced back but the second time he made it through the hoop.

"Jay got married."

"Oh."

"We have not gotten married." Dan sounded as if that was the real clincher that didn't seem to bother Ivy.

"I see." Jory nodded.

"Jay didn't really know Lindy all that long, either and well..." Dan only shrugged about the matter but took the ball and made a lay-up. 

"Well, I know she has a lot on her mind, but she can't leave Hope out of this. Hope needs to know her brother. It's not all about Ivy, you know. You need to speak up. Sounds like she's a real procrastinator."

"Maybe." Dan kept quiet as if no way was he one to move mountains.

What is it about Maisie?

 Cade thought he might be losing his hearing. What? Maisie and the Dr. Pepper guy?

Yeah, Brick filled him in. She still worked in the deli after graduating at the semester's end. She hadn't moved away. She was taking a class or two at metro and she was seeing the Dr. Pepper guy.

They'd lost touch. Cade guessed. Honestly, he felt a little bad about it, because she'd been such a good friend. And a new friend at that. After all, she'd moved here on her own from New York City. An aunt, as he remembered lived here, but she didn't live with her. She hadn't since she graduated.

"So..so is she living with the Dr. Pepper guy now?" Cade looked at Brick blankly. A part of him felt responsible for all this, yet he wasn't sure why. After all, he was a gay high school student with a boyfriend and he worked at the library. Another thing, how come Maisie didn't come to see him at the library? She could have at least got a card, he thought then.

"Oh, I dunno. He visits with her in the afternoons when he comes by to check on the Dr. Pepper supplies," was about all Brick could tell him. "I thought you two were close?"

Cade only nodded. He didn't want to go into with Brick. Obviously, not that close. Cade was beginning to think he'd just have to check this out for himself so he asked if Mercer wanted to go to the grocery store for fried chicken.

"Fried Chicken?" Mercer looked at him funny as if he'd lost it. "Remember that time we got the fried chicken at the Korean snacks place and you said it was too rich for your taste?" He meant that in the price of it.

"Well, it's much better at the deli," Cade said.

"I know what that means," Mercer chuckled. "It's cheap."

"No, it's reasonably priced and it's really good," Cade just said as they drove over to the grocery store before they had to go to work. "Besides, I haven't checked in with Maisie for a while."

"And why is that?" Mercer wanted to know as he practically lounged in the passenger seat.

"I dunno. She's a private person," Cade said. "But..but she's a really good listener and she always listened when I would talk to her about you. I feel like I let her down, somehow. You know, after we got together."

"Oh, you are some friend, all right," Mercer shook his head as if he was much better at this kind of thing than Cade would ever be.

Cade didn't argue. He got to the deli in time. Maisie was still behind the counter and who was she laughing with? The Dr. Pepper guy.

Of course, she looked at both Cade and Mercer as if they were just customers. She waited on them as she was supposed to.

Cade ordered a bucket of chicken. Mercer looked at him as if he'd really lost it.

"What?" Cade looked at him.

"That's a lot of chicken," Mercer said. 

Cade kept his eye on Maisie and asked how it was going.

"Oh, it's going," Maisie smiled. Finally, she caught the Dr. Pepper guy's attention as he was about to leave.

"This is my boyfriend, Harrison," she told him. For a moment, Cade didn't think she would acknowledge him, but he was glad to meet Maisie's boyfriend.

Cozy on a winter's day

 

Valentina couldn't stop smiling. She was elated seeing Matty with the baby. Of course, it wasn't like she was completely resting. She was certain now she might never sleep a night through. She couldn't help but check on Foster every few minutes even when he was asleep on his back in his crib.

"Nobody's said why we named him Foster," Val said to Matty who remained unchanged as he smiled at the plump baby who curled his fingers around Matty's.

"Well, we can't forget we both were foster kids," he said. "I would never want Foster to go through it, but still I'm glad we both had amazing foster parents." He looked a little sad. 

"Foster was really the last name I was thinking, you know." She remembered how they were looking at old names like Ned and Noah.

"I'm glad you weren't mad at me," he finally smiled at her. "But as soon as I saw him, I knew I wanted him to be Foster."

She understood. She felt they were together on this. Yes, maybe too much together, but she liked it that way. She thought of her brother Dan who was at the hospital with them. He was there for the birth of their baby. After all, he was a nurse.

She touched her forehead, thinking that was not the way she wanted her biological brother to see her, at her worst. After all, she kept squeezing Matty's hand. At times, she wanted to pull his hair, but she wasn't that awful. She winced wondering what Dan thought now. Of course, she was happy everything went well. It still made her laugh when the doctor told her she could have a lot more kids. She was certain this was enough. Especially, for right now. 

Of course, there was this semester to think about. She would take one college class and it was online. Hopefully, she wasn't asking for too much.

Steve didn't know if he could take another sentence from Alfie and his chaotic holiday. He sighed. Was it always this way? Alfie talked so much about himself.

"Look, we have a baby now," Steve hated to be the barrier of bad news, but he didn't think they could hang out anymore. "You can't just come when..when you feel like it. We're very busy."

"I know. I get that." Alfie looked a little bug-eyed. "But..but I still need to hear from you."

Steve laughed at that as he picked up a crying True from her crib. Really, she wasn't that fussy, but Steve could even tell True might not be that crazy about Alfie, either.

"Oh really," Steve looked at him blankly. "All you've done since you got here was talk about yourself."

He didn't even bring disposable diapers. It was the least he could do, but Steve knew it was not on Alfie's radar. He didn't mean to ask, but this was getting old with his college friend. Things had changed.

"Got it." Alfie was even-lipped as if he'd take note. "How does it really feel to be a dad?"

"A little intoxicating," Steve smiled. "In a very good way." He told Alfie that he loved Victoria even more. "You know, in a deeper way that..that I've never experienced before."

"Oh," Alfie nodded as if he understood, but Steve knew he couldn't have an inkling about this sort of thing. 

"Maybe you'll experience it yourself one day," Steve told him. Alfie only laughed at him.

"Oh, you really are a fool," Steve smiled back. "It really isn't love  until you give it away."

Alfie couldn't respond. He shoved his hands into his hoodie as if he'd had too much of this. 

"I'm going to see if Victoria made that coffee she promised," Alfie said. He was quiet then. Steve sighed. He knew he couldn't turn his friend away, but he hoped something good happened to Alfie this year and he'd know where Steve was coming from.

He put the baby up to his shoulder. She burped like she might be an old sailor then. He smiled. She pushed her head up like a little turtle seeing the world for the first time out of her shell and she drooled on him. Of course, this only delighted Steve.

I knew it but I see it at last

 "I think he's going through a lot more than he'll ever admit," Harley said about Brick and his troubles at home. Of course, Izzy didn't think any thing of it. She just thought he was being an immature brat. She was still furious with him about how he'd handled the whole Griffin and Brooklyn thing. 

"No wonder he doesn't have that many friends," Izzy was in a pout.

"Now wait a minute," Harley didn't want to get in a spat over Brick, especially since she felt Izzy was her best friend these days. "It hasn't been easy with him. His mom has always had problems. It's amazing Brick has turned out to be the great guy he is." Also, she reminded Brick had made the varsity basketball team this year and didn't have any time to drive anyone around. She knew how Izzy's mind worked. She still liked a fellow who did all the driving when she could be doing it herself. But no, she would call them to come to Lincoln. So now they just had to make do over the phone. Actually, Harley preferred phone calls, while Izzy only wanted to text. 

"Whatever," was all she got out of Izzy. After Izzy hung up Harley began to wonder if Izzy was really over Brick. She shook her head. She had to be. She just had to. After all, Izzy and Link were planning to move in together this summer and were already looking at apartments. 

Still, Harley had her Brick to cheer on. She was there for every basketball game. Of course, she looked for any of his family, but they were never there. This made her sad, but she knew it wasn't her place to nag him or them about it. But he was so good. She at least started sending his grandmother the pics she got of him on the court. 

It wasn't until now she thought maybe she could be a PR person. Of course, he was always worrying she wasn't eating properly. It was hard to tell if they were each other's cheerleader or maybe they nagged each other too much. But she was there for him. And it wasn't until now she felt it didn't really matter what Link and Izzy were doing without them on the weekends. It was best to stay close to each other. And as much as she still wanted to be Brooklyn's friend, Harley felt she could only do so much. She had a life too, and it was with Brick.

Brooklyn couldn't forget what Brick had said at the New Year's party. She couldn't believe that was the way they probably all felt about her. Did she think she hated all of them? That was the night she also found out that Trent was seeing someone else. She'd seen them together while they were out at the mall. Yes, she still went there. And they were so cozy at the coffeehouse. Of course, he'd never taken her there. No, they never went anywhere. Oh, they were in his car a lot, but that didn't mean it was a date.

At first, she wanted to pour hot cocoa all over him and maybe her too, but she didn't. No, she left it alone, blocked his calls, and hoped he got the message to never mess with her again. What was she? Just an in-betweener? Honestly, she felt as if she needed to be with her friends and of course, they all wanted her to meet Griffin.

He wasn't one of those totally into himself like Trent. He really had a good friendship with Link too. And she liked that. Honestly, she wasn't sure what it was about him that made her feel at home. Maybe it was her friends. Maybe it was the fact he wasn't asking for much, but was happy to know her. Of course, it wasn't like they saw each other every weekend. Still, it was nice to have someone to text and she even looked forward to the phone calls. Yes, they were even stepping it up to Facetime. But not all the time. 

It helped that they liked Harry Potter, but he wasn't into cosplay, and yet he liked to write jokes. Except, he knew he wasn't all that funny.

"I just look like an awkward giraffe," he told her.

"But I like giraffes," she told him in a text. Of course, he sent her a photo of a giraffe every day now, and it always made her smile.

I spent a lifetime waiting for the right time

Joon didn't want to bring Poppy's dad into this. He was certain her dad didn't want Poppy to know. Maybe he had been sworn to secrecy of some kind. But really this was Poppy's chance and hopefully they would know why her mother did what she did. 

Of course, Poppy went round and round with emotions. He didn't think she'd slept a wink, even on the airplane and it was a long trip home. He knew she was exhausted, and he couldn't even tell Bom what it was about. But he needed her to help with Niah. Thankfully, she was understanding. Somehow, Bom seemed closer to their parents now after this trip. Maybe that was the best Christmas gift of all. 

Still, it remained a mystery and it was kind of strange how he got the mystery e-mail. Oh, he'd scavenged on all sorts of forums and facebook groups. Somehow, someone reached out to him. She said she'd known her when she was still in college. Poppy's mother was an actress turned professor. "She didn't act in the states," she'd said. Evidently, her parents didn't like her being an actress, either. One of the reasons she'd moved to the states. After all, she was well educated. So the woman from the e-mail said she would come to them.

Joon hoped this worked out. He hoped it wasn't a hoax. It felt as if Poppy's life was already a hoax. Naturally, he said they could come to her place, but she said no. Maybe she thought it might turn out badly, too. Yet, still she arrived on time. Of course, Poppy was having second thoughts, too. Like this was all such a bad idea. Atleast, they were at Poppy's who had as many photos of her dad and even her Aunt. Anything that might spark a conversation. Hopefully, this woman would know something.

Christine had been bummed out ever since Alfie found out about his past. She knew there were things she'd held on to, far too long. And maybe it was time to spill it.

Of course, she'd came across an old group she had hoped would have been more on Facebook. Yes, it was an alumni college thing. She'd hoped to catch up with long lost friends, but instead she found someone looking for answers. Instantly, she knew what this was about. Of course, she'd hoped to have forgotten, but she couldn't. No, she would never forget.

"Actually..actually, she was wanting me to say I..I was your mother on the birth certificate." Christine confessed. "But..but I'm no one's biological mother." Sure she wanted to maybe throw in a laugh or two when she got to Poppy's. But this was no time for a joke.

"See, I used to think I could be a comedian and well, I had joined this improv group, but it was more of an acting group. And, and that's how I met your mother," Christine felt as if she might get misty-eyed. Yes, she couldn't help but shed tears. "I mean, she..she really wasn't one of us. Not just a mere student. She was a little older. I found her very mature and well..quite worldly too." Christine did her best to smile about it. "But she wasn't perfect either. She had a lot on her mind back then. It was as if she'd let her parents down. She would never let them know. But, really..she did want you. I knew that."

Christine winced more tears. "You've been with your mother all along." Of course, she was certain Poppy didn't find much comfort in that.

She shook her head, no. She didn't want to believe it. It couldn't be. Poppy pressed her lips tight as if she knew it felt as if it was such a wasted chunk of her life.

"Now..now she doesn't even know me," Poppy told her about her Aunt having dementia. 

Christine knew it wasn't fair. "Well, sometimes, families can make problems when there shouldn't be. I mean, in the end, it can be pretty stupid, but..but you can't tell them that." Christine knew Poppy's mother came from an era where imperfect lives meant hiding those from the ones you loved. 

"I know your dad," she told her she was certain he'd wanted her to know all along. "I don't think he ever felt he was enough. Not for her, not even for you." Christine knew she couldn't apologize enough, but it was great not to have to keep this secret for another year.

Makes no difference what group I'm in

 "It's not that complicated," Alfie shrugged about the matter of seeing his brother Boone and his dad for New Year's. "I know I could have probably had Christmas with them, but I am a procrastinator."

At least, he wanted Gage to know this much. Of course, Gage only gave him a nod. They went out for coffee. No way was either going to mess up Nora's kitchen. It might as well have been a science lab. These days it was her and Alec's space. Both watched them as if they didn't know what was happening. 

"Well, looks like your January is off to a good start," Gage at least smiled.

"Sure, it is." Alfie sighed feeling he was more of a guest star in his own life. Yes, Boone had his sister Oakley. Alfie didn't know what to make of her. Yet, he couldn't keep his eyes off her. He knew it was wrong, but still, she was probably the best part of a new start of January. Alfie got around to mentioning her. "She seems to be the one who only knows him. It's like she's his-"

"What? Bodyguard?" Gage looked at him blankly.

"No, more like his babysitter," Alfie sipped his coffee. "She's not much older than him, but she does all the driving." Truly, he did envy his baby brother. Alfie didn't like driving either. He went an extra hour early on the drive  to see them at New Year's because he knew he'd get lost. Honestly, he still had no sense of direction, but somehow he made it back. "I probably won't see them again, anyway." He shrugged. Yet, he'd exchanged phone numbers. Oakley seemed to think they needed to keep in contact with each other. It was the least he could do.

"I guess he's OK. He seems to have had a sheltered life," Alfie decided. These were things he hated about his biological brother. He'd never had much of that except with his grandmother. Oh, they never said it, but Alfie was certain now his dad never thought he was his kid, but his father's mother always did. She was his real family. He didn't think he needed to admit it to anyone. Even now, his dad didn't have much to say to him. Perhaps it was too late. Alfie didn't have much to say to him either. 

"You guys need to make plans," Gage told him he needed to spend time with his brother. "I didn't know my brother until later, either, but somehow he's helped me over the years," Gage said he was glad his brother was doing well now in Grand Island. "I didn't want to be a burden, you know. And I know my mom really wanted to be in Alec's life too." 

"But, we've got to move," he said in the next breath. He said they were being a burden. She was sick. It seemed as if she was crumbling as of late. "I don't want to see this happening, but-"

"But what?" Alfie spoke up ever so bright-eyed. "You can live with Nora and me."

Gage almost let a laugh give way. "You better talk to Nora about that first."

Yet my heart wavers from time to time

 

"You've gotta be kidding me!" Brick couldn't help to be furious with Harley and Izzy. What were they doing? Going into a match-making profession? And Lincoln was in on it too. Besides, it was his friend Griffin who he brought to the party.

First of all, it was hard to believe Griffin was a soccer player with those really skinny legs of his. He looked like he'd be better off in girl's clothes. But Brick knew when to keep his mouth shut.

"You think, this is the guy for Brooklyn?" Brick couldn't help but give both of them a dead stare. He looked at the time. Of course, Brooklyn wasn't here. "See you are just wasting this guy's time. She won't come. She never does. She hates us." His voice rose over the music. Of course, everyone was silent because guess who showed up?

Yes, that was so last year. Brick still felt like such a heel. Is that what he was? Oh, god, he had to make time for Lincoln and Griffin now. It was like Izzy and Harley who were deciding who he would hang out with. Dang, if Brooklyn didn't just let everything fall into place.

Of course, even in the shower alone (a few days later), he had to wonder if it were his very words that turned everything around for her. He really wished he knew what he was actually doing. But they were all together. Usually, at Harley's. Watching movies, playing games. Doing something inside because no one wanted to venture out. Yet, they'd managed a basketball game or two with Tony and Kevin.

Actually, Brick found Griffin rather sullen. Possibly, he was depressed as Brooklyn, but they were at least depressed together. She hadn't changed out of her Wednesday look and Griffin looked as if he might be her flower boy the way he hung around her. It was like a TV mashup of some kind and Brick couldn't figure out just how to go about being anyone's friend.

Then Matty became a Dad and that was the only thing on Brick's mind. Of course, he was there to see their little one the moment it was born. No way was anyone going to stop that. He brought infant disposable diapers and whatever else any of the women on staff at the grocery store who knew Matty gave him to bring.

So of course, January brought more friends and more growing up to think about. Still, Brick wasn't sure he'd changed at all. He still lived at his grandmother's even if he step-dad asked him at Christmas to move back home. He hated to put him off, but even if he did change he knew his mother wouldn't, even after all this time.

You're not afraid of people passing by or even the past

 "Oh, it was a party all right," the way Simon said it. It was as if he'd delivered the baby right there at the party, but Victoria only had contractions and rang in the new year at the hospital with a baby girl. Naturally, Steve was right by her side.

"Yeah, and we're still all friends," Chevy smiled back. After all, they were honorary uncles to baby True. "Who would have thunk it?" 

Simon knew Chevy had been waiting for this day. Yes, Simon took his time ever wanting to speak to his ex again. But maybe it was all Chevy and Mick's doing. But then again he'd been in full-throttle mode with his startup company of fixing old houses and selling them to first-time buyers. He didn't have time for this kind of thing. And then they had their New Year's Party which included far too many people. But Melissa and Rylie were there and so were Brandon and Declan. It was a good time for all.

Of course, when they did get to the hospital, they found out about Matty and Valentina's arrival. It was definitely a big night for babies on New Year's. They had a baby boy and his name was Foster and he was huge. Chevy said he looked already a month old. "How did she even have it?"

But all was well and Simon was happy they could be there for the party. He knew his brother Xander was elated to be a grandpa. Yes, 2023 was looking good. Although, it was still cold. Not exactly the kind of weather you could enjoy the Christmas lights in. However, there had been a nice warming trend for a day or so when it got back up to warmer temps. Still not enough for Simon.

If he could he would say to Chevy, "Let's go to Miami!" But he was still busy and it was best to keep working. 

Really, it was the last person Yuki expected to meet at Chevy and Simon's party, but she got to catch up with Melissa. Emily was there with her and it was still an adjustment with the broken arm, but things were getting better.

"How did that happen?" Melissa wanted to know. Rylie was concerned too. She said she'd heard Brandon talk about it. Honestly, Yuki wanted to keep this all low-key, but suddenly it felt like she had some real friends around her. She didn't know what to say. But it was a good feeling. It was as if she felt she could talk with ease. No longer stuck, waiting for someone to tell her what she could and couldn't talk about.

There was Emily too who made Christmas feel real with a tree, Christmas lights, and of course cozy treats, and a marathon of all of Yuki's favorite Christmas movies. Yet, the holidays just got better. Going out, meeting up with Brandon and Declan, and now Melissa and Rylie. Truly, she hadn't thought January would be giving her so much to look forward to. And she was even getting holiday pay at work.